I had this big rant on why things happen, but my own issues with God and religion would color anything I had to say. I would not want to lose any of my wonderful friends.
So I will keep the rant to myself.
I no longer have any answer to give him when he asks why is this happening to him. I don't know is just not good enough anymore (never really was) , it offers no help or comfort.
I am back to feeling very helpless in all of this. I am supposed to care for them, keep them safe and warm, ease their fears and help them learn how to survive in this big harsh world. I can't even help him survive elementary school.
Things have take several steps back, back to where he is begging not to be taken to school, holding on to walls, door knobs and car handles. Mondays are hard, always have been.
It is just too much to go back after being home for two days.
The school nurse is a real bitch. She should have retired a long time ago. Most kids do not notice sarcasm or recognize snide comments, but mine does. I have talked to her and the principle about being kind and understanding. The need to not make things worse. I know this is a very frustrating situation for all involved and can be disruptive to the routine in the office, but come on. Have some compassion, they are not adults but children with fragile feelings and little self confidence.
I will be glad when Christmas break starts, the horrible mornings will end for awhile.
I do know a whole new set of issues will begin. I can never decide what is worse. Too much togetherness is rough for everyone. He commented the other day that he bets I wish he was not my son. I cannot emphasize enough how much that is untrue. I wish a lot of things, I wish my cousin had not been killed when he was 17 and I was 15, I wish I still had my grandparents, I wish we had more money but I do not wish away any of my children.